{"id":1085,"date":"2011-07-01T20:04:13","date_gmt":"2011-07-01T20:04:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/lurdinha.org\/site\/?p=1085"},"modified":"2011-07-01T20:15:39","modified_gmt":"2011-07-01T20:15:39","slug":"2-coisas-que-vc-deveria-saber-sobre-colombo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/lurdinha.org\/site\/2-coisas-que-vc-deveria-saber-sobre-colombo\/","title":{"rendered":"2 coisas que vc deveria saber sobre Colombo!"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

N\u00famero 1<\/strong>
\n Colombo foi o primeiro frila da hist\u00f3ria.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Ele, que era italiano, fez um mega frila para a Espanha. Navegou da Europa at\u00e9 a Am\u00e9rica, aportando por aqui em 1492 e enchendo o caixa de Fernando e Isabel.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mas assinou uma esp\u00e9cie de cess\u00e3o de direitos autorais e ficou com uma m\u00edsera parte da riqueza que gerou.<\/strong><\/p>\n

N\u00e3o t\u00e3o m\u00edsera, na verdade. Mas como era um administrador p\u00edfio (como todo frila), morreu esquecido e renegado pelo edit…, digo, rei da Espanha.<\/strong><\/p>\n

E, para completar, como todo frila, ele ficou conhecido por v\u00e1rios pseud\u00f4nimos, ao gosto do fregu\u00eas: Crist\u00f3bal Col\u00f3n, Christophorus Columbus, Crist\u00f3v\u00e3o Colombo, Christopher Columbus e o original Cristoforo Colombo.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Acho que o Colombo devia ser o patrono dos frilas.<\/strong><\/p>\n

N\u00famero 2<\/strong>
\n Colombo era solteiro!!!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Recentes pesquisas cient\u00edficas comprovam que Colombo s\u00f3 descobriu a Am\u00e9rica porque era solteiro! Se ele fosse casado, seria obrigado a ouvir coisas assim e teria desistido:<\/strong><\/p>\n

– E por que \u00e9 que voc\u00ea tem que ir? Por que n\u00e3o mandam outro?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Voc\u00ea mal conhece a minha fam\u00edlia e quer ir descobrir outro mundo?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– E s\u00f3 vai homem nessa viagem? Acha que sou idiota?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– E por que eu n\u00e3o posso ir?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Sei! N\u00e3o sabe mais o que inventar pra sair de casa?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Meu irm\u00e3o pode ir?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Aposto que vai ter muita bebida, n\u00e3o vai?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Se cruzar esta porta, eu vou embora para a casa da minha m\u00e3e!<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Quem \u00e9 Pinta? E quem \u00e9 essa tal de Nina? E essa tal Maria piranha, que ainda se diz Santa?<\/strong>
\n (hehehe, essa foi a melhor!)<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Tinha tudo planejado, n\u00e9?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– J\u00e1 me disseram que voc\u00ea vai mesmo \u00e9 se encontrar com umas \u00edndias! Pensa que me engana?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– A rainha Isabel vai vender suas j\u00f3ias para voc\u00ea viajar? Acha que sou idiota? O que \u00e9 que voc\u00ea tem com essa vaca ?<\/strong><\/p>\n

– Pode tirar seu cavalinho da chuva. Voc\u00ea n\u00e3o vai a lugar nenhum!<\/strong><\/p>\n

E s\u00f3 para fechar:<\/strong><\/p>\n

11 Coisas que Cristov\u00e3o Colombo diria se estivesse vivo hoje…<\/strong><\/p>\n

11. “Esse tal de menino Slow \u00e9 do balacobaco”<\/strong>
\n 10. \u201cPor favor, por onde anda a \u2018Vi\u00fava Porcina\u2019 de Roque Santeiro!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

9. \u201cMeu Deus, este pa\u00eds ficou emo!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

8. \u201cEsque\u00e7a-me \u2013 Parabenizem o cara que descobriu o hamb\u00farguer de Soja\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

7. \u201cSer\u00e1 que \u00e9 a mesma Hebe Camargo que estava na Pinta?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

6. \u201cDescobri o continente e tudo que eu ganho \u00e9 Tele Sena?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

5. \u201d Minha descoberta mais recente? A cole\u00e7\u00e3o de Paulo Coelho em promo\u00e7\u00e3o no Submarino \u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

4. \u201cCom\u00e9dia \u00e0s 8 da noite? J\u00e1 estava na hora!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

3. \u201cDou para Madona e Jesus 6 meses\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

2. \u201cEu acredito que \u00e9 poss\u00edvel para o homem, com alimenta\u00e7\u00e3o adequada e suprimentos, a circunavegar Preta Gil\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. \u201cEu tenho 558 anos de idade e ainda aparento melhor do que S\u00edlvio Santos\u201d<\/strong>
\n LURDINHA \u00c9 CULTURA PORRA!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

  N\u00famero 1 Colombo foi o primeiro frila da hist\u00f3ria. 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